The Hell of Finals Week
by Booklover139
Summary: A HILARIOUS parody of The Bells of Notre Dame!


The Hell of Finals Week:   
A parody of "The Bells of Notre Dame," from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame.  
  
Gossip:  
Morning in high school, the students awake  
To the hell of finals week  
The janitors clean up, the lunch ladies bake  
To the hell of finals week  
To the big tests as long as a textbook  
To the little tests short as a geek  
And some say the soul of the high school's  
The toll of the hell  
The hell of finals week  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah)  
  
Listen, they are beautiful, no? So many multiple choices, so many changing rules, because you know, they don't grade all by themselves.  
  
Mini Me:  
They don't?  
  
Gossip:  
No, you silly boy. Up there, high, high in the dark Administration Building, lives the mysterious test grader. Who is this creature?  
  
Mini Me:  
Who?  
  
Gossip:  
What is he?  
  
Mini Me:  
What?  
  
Gossip:  
How did he come to be there?  
  
Mini Me:  
How?  
  
Gossip:  
Hush!  
  
  
Mini Me:  
Aaaww…  
  
Gossip:  
Gossip will tell you. It is a tale, a tale of an essay, and a SPAM!  
  
Bright was the day when our tale was begun  
In the hell of finals week  
  
Student 1:  
Hush them up, will you?  
  
Student 2:  
We'll be spotted!  
  
Student 3:  
Hush everyone.  
  
Gossip:  
Four frightened students slid silently  
Into the school for finals week  
  
Student 1:  
Ten dollars for safe passage to the classroom.  
  
Gossip:  
But a trap had been laid for the students  
And they gazed up in fear and alarm  
At a figure whose clutches were iron  
As much as the hell  
  
Student 2:  
Mr. Frollo!  
  
Gossip:  
The hell of finals week  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah)  
  
Mister Frollo longed to purge the school  
Of slacking kids  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah)  
And he saw corruption everywhere  
Except in his  
  
  
Frollo:  
Bring these student vermin to the Detention Room  
  
  
Minion 1:  
You there! What are you hiding?!  
  
Frollo:  
Stolen grades, no doubt. Take them from her.  
  
Gossip:  
She ran!  
  
(Lots of running in the hall. She ends up at the principal's office)  
  
Student 1:  
Sanctuary, please give me sanctuary!  
  
(Frollo corners her, snatches the file, and writes F on it, failing her instantly. Then he looks at it more closely.)  
  
Frollo:  
An essay? Gasp. A SPAM!  
  
(He looks around frantically and spots a nearby trash can. He goes to it, and is just about to drop the file in when---)  
  
Principal:  
Stop!  
  
Gossip:  
Cried the Principal.  
  
Frollo:  
This is an unholy paper! I'm sending it back to Hell, where it belongs!  
  
Principal:  
See here the innocent red ink you've spilt  
In the hell of finals week  
  
Frollo:  
I am guiltless, the paper was doomed.  
  
Principal:  
Now you would add this child's grade to your guilt   
In the hell of finals week  
  
Frollo:  
My conscience is clear!  
  
Principal:  
You can lie to yourself and your minions  
You can claim it's not vengeance you seek,  
But you never can run from  
Nor hide what you've done from the sighs  
The very sighs of finals week!  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah)  
  
Gossip:  
And for once in his career   
Of grammar such as "runned"  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah)  
Frollo felt a twinge of fear  
For his retirement fund  
  
Frollo:  
What must I do?  
  
Principal:  
Take the essay, and grade it as your own.  
  
Frollo:  
What? I'm to be saddled with this miswritten--Very well, but let it be graded here, in your district.  
  
Principal:  
Graded here? Where?  
  
Frollo:  
Anywhere…  
Just so it's kept locked away so no one else can see.  
The Administration Building, perhaps. And who knows, our Board works in mysterious ways…  
Even this foul paper may yet prove one day to be   
(dumm)  
Of use to me  
  
Gossip:  
And Frollo gave the child a cruel grade, a grade that means half-formed:   
Incomplete!  
  
Now here is a riddle to guess if you can  
In the hell of finals week  
What is outstanding and what is the SPAAAM?  
  
In the hell, hell, hell, hell  
Hell, hell, hell, hell  
Hell of finals weeeeek!  
(Ah ah ah ah ah aaah!) 


End file.
